Two words keep running through my mind the last few minutes as I pondered how to approach what I wish to write about today. These two words are:
What I had intended to write about was “Organized Solitude” but what kept coming out was the other. In thinking about what I meant by Organized Solitude – it’s more along the lines of “Self-Imposed Solitude” – which in a way is bit oxymoron-ish – like Organized Chaos.
So…why am I pondering this? Did you READ yesterday’s post?? It appears I have reached the proverbial wall and even my subconscious and my new blue print are conspiring to beat me over the head to tell me to chill! I’ve given everything I have and now I need to decompress. I’ve always known I needed this. I just don’t always listen to myself till it’s at a critical state. In hindsight it always seems like such a no-brainer…which I admit having missed.
Being a primary “blue” (intimacy) and a secondary “yellow” (fun) it’s easy to believe I could just keep going…something similar to the energizer bunny. I need down time. Time to recharge my batteries and realign my psyche. Time to regroup and get back on track.
Yesterday was a huge eye opener for me. I allowed myself to get so over extended that I was no longer functioning in a manner conducive with my expectations for myself. Getting back to #1 from yesterday…Be kind to myself!
I am going up north to a resort for the weekend. I had signed up for a women’s retreat get away just over a month ago and was disappointed when I heard they were cancelling. Rather than wallow in that particular feeling I chose to take matters into hand and requested whether I could still partake in the group rate for myself. YES!!
YEAH! I have a room with a fireplace, logs included with the room, 5 meals from Friday to Sunday morning, a balcony and solitude if I wish it. I wish it.
Am shutting off my phone. Am only turning on my computer to post my daily blog (a commitment I will maintain). Am turning my back on email. On facebook scrolling. On twitter sharing (just 3 days – I’ll be back!). On human interaction. On the craziness at our house in the midst of painting, decluttering, selling and working. On the busyness of everything that has transpired in the last two months with both of our families.
Self-imposed solitude! Not sure which core colour requires this to maintain sanity but I’m going to feed her this weekend. I look forward to the creative results of my solitude. Will it be organized chaos or the cosmos unfolding as it is intended to.