I’m amazed every day as a parent. I truly wish everyone could experience the joy we feel each day being able to be there for our little man. When one thinks of their “dharma” – their purpose in life – I believe many of us think it to be some thing we do ourselves which leaves an impact on others. Sometimes though, upon reflection, I can believe MY purpose may be to be Gregory’s mom – so that what we may be able to guide him to be, will allow him to have an impact on our humanity in some way. Moments after birth the nurse turned to us, as she held our son up for me to get a good look at him, and said “He is an old soul”. I embraced this then and still do. He teaches me…us…so much.
Today during our evening chill session I asked Greg if he was enjoying life? Yes. Was he happy? Yes. What makes him happy? “Mya, you and Daddy.” Less than a minute later he said that he was happy for his grandparents too: Dido & Bunia…Nana & Grampie. Because they met, they had us. And then we met and had him.
My sister commented to me a few days ago that he will eventually rebel…as all kids get to a point where they rebel against all that we’ve taught them as parents. Her hope for me was that I would be strong enough to allow him to rebel and be himself.
I struggle with this concept. He is a good kid. We’ve taught him to understand there are always more than one perspective to consider and ll actions have a cause and effect. We’ve taught him to negotiate and tolerate, be strong and compassionate, focus and hang out, to express himself knowing we are listening. If this results in a child who wishes to ‘rebel’, possibly due to whatever stage in his life he happens to be in, we will continue to be who we are now. We will allow. For now though…this is my now. And it’s all that I imagined it to be…and then some!
Before I had a child I imagined being a parent and envisioned my motto being “Lots of Love and Rules” . Then for a time I thought I would not be able to be a parent and so convinced myself it was best: I may not have been able to be selfless enough. When Walter and I knew we were pregnant….we agreed the only other rule was to “Make Every Day Count”.
I enjoy today. I see our future. Our son is exactly who he is meant to be. I see our future reality. I feel the peace, the love, the joy and am overwhelmed by our blessings. If any part of my dharma includes me being Greg’s mom, I say….as loudly as I can for all to hear…Thank you! Gracias! Merci Beaucoup! Mahalo!